


In Jeopardy!

by MittenWraith



Series: Everything is Subtext [4]
Category: Jeopardy! (US TV), Supernatural
Genre: Established Relationship, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, Game Shows, Human Castiel, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-18
Updated: 2016-07-18
Packaged: 2018-07-24 18:08:39
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,745
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7518061
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MittenWraith/pseuds/MittenWraith
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>While on an awful hunt, trapped in a motel during a torrential rainstorm, Cas discovers television game shows.</p>
            </blockquote>





	In Jeopardy!

**Author's Note:**

  * For [WinJennster](https://archiveofourown.org/users/WinJennster/gifts).



> I've had a "TFW on Jeopardy" prompt in my To Be Written file for ages now, but then I saw [this post](http://mittensmorgul.tumblr.com/post/145869995730/winjennster-for-shanandco0825-high-in) and sort of went nuts in the tags... and Jenn told me I needed to write more. So I did. :)
> 
> And I think I'll put the rest of the notes at the end, so as not to spoil the whole story. :D

It had been a really boring hunt.

Dean would usually be all over the chance to spend a few days in a beachside resort town, even in a chilly mid-Atlantic resort town in late January. Even with some kind of mutant swamp monster leaving a trail of slimy, half-digested joggers all over town. There was just something about the beach in winter when there were no crowds around. It might’ve been too cold to swim, or even to hang out on the sand catching some sun, but the air was still salty and the ocean still roared. It just felt alive somehow. Well, aside from the dead bodies washing up in the nearby salt marshes every couple of weeks.

That particular beach during that particular week may have felt just a little _too_ alive for Dean’s taste. A freak coastal storm had kept them pinned to their motel rooms waiting out the frigid monsoon for the past two days. The only upside to the entire mess was that the motel was completely vacant apart from them so they'd had their pick of rooms when they checked in. Sam got his very own room adjoining the one Dean and Cas were sharing, so at least they all had someplace to retreat to when they needed a break.

There was barely anything open in the small summer boomtown. They didn’t have the reprieve of a local bar to kill time at, or even one of those crappy souvenir shops to browse around in for an hour or two. No salt water taffy, no vinagery boardwalk french fries, and no tacky trinkets to tease Sam with. Most of the town had been boarded up until spring. It was either languish in the room with only their research and a tv that was on the fritz to keep them company or wander the marshes in the freezing downpour in a blind search for whatever had been snagging joggers for the last few months. So, languishing it was.

There was a diner a block away where they’d been making a mad dash through the rain a couple times a day just to break up the boredom and fend off starvation, but there’s only so many cheeseburgers Sam could stomach before he just wanted to eat something green again. On day three of their miserable motel lockdown he was about to snap.

Sam decided to brave the drive to the mini mart and deli they’d passed about half an hour outside of town to try and find some real food. He took Dean and Cas’s orders-- _no Dean, I won’t forget the pie_ \-- and made a mad dash through the pelting rain to Baby. Dean yelled out one more warning for Sam not to crash his car, but Sam didn’t even acknowledge him as he tore out of the parking lot and out onto the highway.

While Sam had been compiling his shopping list, Cas had spent the last few minutes fiddling with the television. Again. They’d occasionally been able to get a channel to come in through the static long enough to see a weather report, just to discover that yes, it was still raining.

“Thank you, Captain Obvious,” Dean growled at the cheerful weathergirl the last time they’d tried to find something to watch, then switched the thing off again.

“I think I found something other than the weather channel,” Cas said, standing back and smiling at a blessedly non-staticky cat food commercial.

Dean slumped back down into his chair, took one glance at a cat contentedly head-booping its grinning owner, and huffed. He hunched over the table to page through yet another moldy old book pulled from the town’s meager archives. “I guess anything’s better than silence. Maybe it’ll help drown out the sound of the rain.”

Cas watched the end of the commercial and then hummed in acquiescence. He took a seat in the chair opposite Dean’s and picked up the book he’d been studying. They sat through a few more commercials for a local car dealership, a fast food joint, and then it was back to the show.

Dean heard a familiar jingle and then the instantly recognizable voice of Alex Trebek announcing the Double Jeopardy round. He groaned and sat back in his chair rubbing his eyes while the blooping and beeping of the game board setting up played in the background.

Cas stared at him for a second. “Are you feeling okay, Dean?”

“It’s just… this,” Dean waved his hand at the tv. “Of all the damn channels in the universe, why the hell did we end up with the fucking Game Show Network?”

Cas glanced over at the tv long enough to see Alex ask a question and then one of the contestants ring in and answer incorrectly.

“Clementine,” Cas replied, confused. “The correct answer should’ve been clementine.”

Another contestant rang in and answered, “What is a clementine?”

And then selected another category.

“Don’t start, Cas,” Dean said. “It’ll suck you in, and then we won’t ever figure out how to kill the swamp thing and we’ll be stuck in this miserable room forever.”

Dean’s response only served to make Cas more confused. It seemed like an innocent enough program. It was interesting, even. Definitely better than the weather channel.

“I don’t understand,” Cas replied, glancing from the tv to Dean and then back again in time to answer the next question. “Is this program cursed? How would it _suck us in_?”

“Figuratively, Cas. Figuratively. It’s not background noise. It’s distracting.”

“Sometimes a distraction is a good thing,” Cas argued, answering _platypus_ before the contestant on the show could. “Like Sam going for a drive in this terrible weather just to take his mind of the hunt for a short while. Human brains need breaks.”

Cas answered _Francois Mitterand_ and then turned back to Dean, waiting for him to reply.

Dean just glared at Cas for a minute but he could see that Cas looked exhausted too. He let go of a sarcastic comment about broken brains before it could pass his lips and sighed. “Fine, okay, we’ll watch the damn show for a bit. Just don’t tell Sammy we slacked off while he was out risking his life to bring us beer and pie.”

Cas smiled at him, leaned over and patted Dean’s knee, and then scooted his chair around the table next to Dean’s so he could see the tv better. Dean just sighed and shut his book, slouching down to try and get more comfortable in the stiff-backed chair. He fidgeted through the next three questions that Cas answered before Alex could even finish asking them, and then gave up and pushed himself to his feet. If they were gonna do this thing, they should at least do it right.

“Come on, Cas,” he said, climbing onto the bed and patting the spot next to him. “If we’re taking a break then we’re damn well gonna enjoy it.”

Cas tossed a quick glance at Dean before responding to the next question. “If I join you, will you let me watch this show.”

Dean laughed. “Yes, I will let you watch the show. That’s the whole point.” He patted the bed again.

Cas finally got up just in time for one of the contestants to hit a Daily Double and the laser noises to start up. The sound effect startled Cas and he crouched down beside his chair while the tv audience clapped. Dean couldn’t hold it in and burst out laughing.

“Shit, Cas. It’s just the bonus question. Come on.”

He glared at Dean, glanced dubiously at the television while the contestant dithered over her wager, and then edged his way to the bed. It was a video clue, but Cas didn’t even have to look at the screen as he crawled his way up the bed to Dean’s side to come up with the correct answer.

“Pygmy,” he said, settling down against the pillows just as the woman on television guessed correctly.

The game continued and Dean became more and more intrigued with Cas’s ability to answer every question, even the one that stumped all three contestants on the show. If nothing else, watching Cas watch Jeopardy was proving to be far more entertaining than their pointless research.

At the end of the round, Alex announced the Final Jeopardy category, _The Middle Ages_ , and then cut to another commercial break.

“You shouldn’t have any trouble with that category, eh?” Dean said. “I mean, you were around back then.”

Cas shrugged. “That doesn’t mean I know everything that happened everywhere on the planet at that time.”

“Well, you haven’t missed a question yet.”

“I’ve been wondering,” Cas said, propping himself up on one elbow so he could comfortably look over at Dean. “Why do they phrase their answers as questions?”

“It’s the rules?” Dean answered. “I don’t know, that’s how Jeopardy works.”

Cas kept staring at him for a minute, but then the show came back on and he once again got comfortable against the headboard, sitting just a little bit closer to Dean. Alex read the answer and the theme song played while all three contestants wrote down their questions.

“Athens,” Cas said, and then corrected himself. “What is Athens.”

“There you go,” Dean said, patting Cas’s thigh. “Now you got the hang of it.”

The music ended and Alex went one by one revealing the contestants’ answers and then their wagers. The winner was declared, the audience clapped again, and then the show was ending. Cas just stared at the television, at the woman who just won over $27,000 in less than half an hour.

And then, since this was the Game Show Network, another episode began.

They were halfway through their fourth episode by the time Sam got back. They’d been so wrapped up in the show they hadn’t even noticed that it had finally stopped raining. Sam barged his way into their room with three bags of food, a case of beer, and Dean’s pie, and it still wasn’t enough to pull Dean’s attention from the Jeopardy phenomenon at his side.

“Nice to see you guys, too,” Sam said, setting the pie down on the nightstand beside Dean and handing him a fork. “Oh, the weather’s clearing up and the roads weren’t too bad, thanks for asking.”

Dean glared at Sam and jerked his head toward Cas, who was still answering every question. Sometime between the second and third episode, Dean had reached over and grabbed the click pen off the little desk in the motel and handed it to Cas to use as a buzzer, just like the contestants on the show. Sam watched Cas click away at the pen before giving each answer.

“I guess you guys didn’t solve our monster problem while I was gone.”

“Shush, Sam. The round’s almost over.”

Sam scoffed at his brother and stood there incredulously until Cas clicked and answered the final two questions before the commercial break.

“Have you guys really just been sitting here all afternoon watching Jeopardy?”

“Kind of?” Dean replied, as the reality of their situation began settling in. Dean was not someone who let reality kick him around though, and he rallied back. “But Cas hasn’t missed a single question in nearly two hours. It’s… not natural.”

“Huh,” Sam replied, sitting down in Dean’s long-ago vacated chair.

“I’ve been practicing with the buzzer, too,” Cas added, holding up the pen.

Dean was mostly joking when he made the next suggestion. “So what do you think? After we gank the thing from the Black Lagoon here we head out toward L.A. and try and get Cas on Jeopardy.”

Sam just stared, horrified, at his brother.

“We can’t put Cas on national television, Dean. We might as well paint a target on ourselves and hang a huge neon sign over the studio for every monster and nasty creature in the country to come and eat us.”

Yeah, it had been mostly a joke, but Dean still felt the need to defend himself.

“It’s not like they broadcast live, Sammy. We’d be long gone before anything with a grudge got wind of us.”

Sam considered that while he put the fresh groceries he bought into the tiny fridge in his room and then came back to shove the beer in the fridge in Dean and Cas’s room. The Final Jeopardy round was in full swing by then and Cas was using his click pen buzzer for its original intended purpose-- to jot his answer down on a pad of hotel note paper while the theme song played on television. Sam got a look at the question on screen and blurted out, “Massachusetts and Connecticut.”

Dean and Cas both turned an icy glare on him and Cas slowly held up the paper he’d also written Massachusetts and Connecticut on for Sam to see.

“Way to ruin the game, Sammy,” Dean said.

“How did I… we can all play! It’s not like we’re in the studio audience or anything!”

Dean just shook his head and leaned back against Cas’s shoulder to watch Alex declare the winner.

“Cas had the right answer before me anyway,” Sam said.

Dean and Cas were both disappointed when the next show to come on wasn’t Jeopardy, but Hollywood Squares.

“Guess it’s time we got back to work anyway,” Dean said, giving Cas a quick kiss on the cheek before standing up and stretching, then switching off the tv when he crossed the room to fetch himself a cold beer. “That was still pretty damn impressive.”

Sam surreptitiously googled a few things when Dean wandered back over to the table to crack open the book he’d been skimming through before the Jeopardy marathon. Cas joined them a moment later looking more alert and refreshed than he had in a couple of days. It could’ve just been the sun finally streaming in through the large picture window of their room, but Dean was pretty sure Cas was right and the break from endless research had done them both a world of good.

“So get this,” Sam said. “Jeopardy is running an online contestant search next weekend. You can take the test to try out for the show if you want, Cas. It couldn’t hurt, and you might enjoy it.”

Dean glared at Sam for a second until Sam turned the laptop around, blushing slightly and shrugging in apology. Sam hadn’t meant to ruin their fun, and he’d actually done some research that finally paid off. Since it was a first for this particular hunt, Dean was more than happy to take the small win. Dean just nodded at his brother and then turned to see Cas practically beaming at the contestant sign-up form on Sam’s screen.

“Wait, so we’re really gonna do this?” Dean asked as Cas reached out tentatively to take the computer Sam offered him. “We’re gonna let Cas go on Jeopardy? On tv, where everyone can get a good look at him?”

Sam shrugged. “I hadn’t really thought that far ahead yet. I mean, he’s got to pass the test first…”

Dean laughed and rolled his eyes, nudging Cas with his elbow. “Like that’s not a given.”

Sam ignored them both and kept talking. “I read the procedure, Dean. People who pass are invited to take a second, in-person test and go through an interview process, and then they’re added to the potential contestant pool for a year and a half. They may or may not get a call back. Passing the test isn’t a guarantee you’ll get picked for the show.”

“Guess that’s how they weed out the weirdos,” Dean said, nodding along to Sam’s explanation.

Cas looked concerned at that and finally sat back in his chair and dropped his hands to his lap. “I suppose I qualify as a _weirdo_ in this case.”

“Cas, no,” Dean said, leaning over to rest a hand on Cas’s shoulder until he was sure he had his full attention. “You’re not a weirdo. You’re brilliant, and adorable, and hilarious. Of course they’d want you on their dumb show.”

Cas tried not to smile at that and shook his head. “But Dean, Alex asks all those questions during the interview segment. What can I possibly talk about? I spent four billion years as an angel and then fell to save one human, and now we live in a secret bunker and travel the country killing monsters and stopping apocalypses.”

Sam practically choked on his beer laughing and Dean just glared at the both of them.

“You lie, Cas. Make some shit up. I don’t think they actually care what you say. Tell them about bees, tell them about that time you washed a pair of red socks with all of Sammy’s white shirts. Tell them about the time we went to Paris.”

“As long as I leave out the fact it was an alternate universe version of Paris and we’d been transported there by a goddess who was trying to teach us a lesson,” Cas replied rather snarkily, but hey, at least he was getting the hang of the lying thing.

Dean nodded and pointed one finger at him. “That’s the ticket.”

“I think I could manage that,” Cas said.

Sam finally dragged them all back around to the point. “You could play a few games, rake in a ton of legally-obtained cash, and then tank on purpose so we can get out of L.A. before your episodes start airing. We might actually be able to not worry about money for a while. It would be nice for once to come by it honestly, at least. Or mostly honestly, anyway.”

“I got no problem taking the handouts Charlie’s been directing our way. The dirty politicians she mooches it from didn’t earn it honestly, either,” Dean replied. “But yeah, it would be nice to pay her back for once.”

Cas cleared his throat. “Uh, if I’m supposed to be earning this money legally, we’ll have to manufacture a false identity for me to use.” He pointed at the monitor and the long list of personal questions the registration form required him to fill out. “I assume you don’t want me to use the bunker’s address, or the name Winchester.”

“Yeah, I guess we need to bring Charlie in on this sooner than later,” Dean replied, pulling out his phone and dialing her number. “We’ll get you a real fake identity and we’ll see what happens.”

 

The first thing that happened was that Cas finally caught a glimpse of their swamp monster while out for a jog with Sam the next morning. It turned out to be a wayward kelpie, which they took care of later that night with a couple of iron spears and a beachside bonfire. Problem solved, and they finally got to go home.

Charlie was waiting for them at the bunker when they got back from their trip, fake ID and all the paperwork Cas needed to “legally” appear on a game show in hand. It was only then that Sam had a small crisis of conscience.

“Is it really fair for a former angel to compete against a couple of humans?” Sam asked while they were all sitting around sharing a pizza in the kitchen. They’d stuck around their motel room the day after Cas’s first brush with the show to watch the daily Jeopardy marathon, and Sam was as amazed as Dean had been at the breadth and depth of Castiel’s knowledge. “I mean, the people you’d be competing against wouldn’t stand a chance.”

“How many people you think Cas has given a second chance to, Sammy?” Dean asked, setting down his beer and leaning across the table. “How many of them never even knew they’d been touched by an angel but got to go about their lives because Cas stepped in to save them?”

Sam thought about that for a second. “Sure, but they weren’t competing in good faith on a _game show_ , Dean. It’s not a life or death situation.”

Dean just shrugged. “Consider it Cas’s payback for a few billion years worth of good deeds.”

“To be fair I did balance out any good deeds with a few terrible deeds,” Cas said, slumping down in his seat and staring at the slice of pizza on his plate.

“Nope,” Dean replied, pulling him into a tight hug. “We agreed we’re not gonna talk about all the bullshit you were backed into a corner over. You were trying to stop the damn apocalypse. The whole fucking planet would be gone by now otherwise.”

“I’d like to say thanks,” Charlie replied. “I didn’t like Dick, but I wouldn’t have met you guys otherwise, so I consider it a fair trade.”

Cas smiled fondly at her.

“So I think he deserves a shot at winning,” she added, tapping Cas’s forehead. “It’s not like he’s cheating. He came by all that information in there fair and square.”

Cas grimaced again and Dean cleared his throat.

“Well, most of it, anyway,” he said.

When Charlie frowned, Cas told her all about Metatron’s massive pop culture download.

“Wait, so you’re telling me he shoved ten thousand years worth of information into your head all at once?” she said, her eyes bugging out in horror.

Cas shrugged. “Essentially.”

“Ow. That must’ve been… traumatic.”

“In a word, yes. Dean’s still helping me sort through it all and make sense of it.”

“Well, I’d be happy to help you out if I can,” Charlie said, grinning. “Someone’s gotta pick up the slack where Dean’s geeky knowledge falls short.”

“Hey,” Dean blurted out, but then shut his mouth with an alarmed look on his face. He was unsure if this was really the time to defend his vast knowledge of things Charlie would consider _geeky_ , or if it was better to let it go for now. With Sam giving him a curious look, he decided it was better to just change the subject.

Dean cleared his throat.

“So, are we good to get Cas registered for that test?”

Charlie glared at him for a moment but let him dodge the geek throwdown. For now. “Yeah, I did a little research, and found out they let you keep more of your cash if you’re a California resident. So congrats, Castiel Singer, you’ve officially moved to San Diego. You work as a consultant for a national investment firm, and for technical purposes you own a condo on Pacific Beach. You’ve done well for yourself, my friend.”

“So, what,” Sam said, once again the voice of reason. He’d done his research too. “They’re gonna mail his winnings to some nonexistent address in San Diego? How are we supposed to collect the paycheck?”

“I’ll set up a P.O. box if it comes to that,” Charlie replied, patting Sam’s arm. “Don’t worry. We’ve got this covered.”

After dinner, Charlie presented Cas with her laptop and they all stood around and watched him enter his assumed identity into the boxes and click submit. Charlie gave him a quick little hug and congratulated him.

“You’re gonna do great.”

 

The online test date rolled around just over a week later. Cas spent the afternoon leading up to the test in a state of indecision. He’d already changed his mind half a dozen times over whether or not he’d prefer an audience while taking the fifty question test. Charlie decided the best way for him to make a decision was to give both methods a test run. She sat him down and had him practice, first reading out questions to him over the phone while she, Sam, and Dean stayed out of the library, and then again while they all sat around the table for moral support.

Castiel may have had eons worth of information in his head, but none of that translated into the speedy typing skills he needed to answer the questions within the short span of seconds the test allowed for each reply. Charlie asked him questions and then watched with a rather pained expression as he hunted and pecked his way through trying to type his answers in time.

“Um, can I make a suggestion?” she said after he failed to finish typing his answer on the third question in a row. “Would you consider telling me your answers and letting me type them in for you?”

“I don’t think we’re allowed assistance,” Cas replied.

Charlie looked to Sam and Dean for help, and Sam finally chimed in.

“She’s not gonna help you cheat, Cas. We just want to make sure you don’t miss any answers because you’re not used to typing yet.”

“Yeah,” Dean added. “They don’t make you type on the show. It’s not a typing contest. Plus, who’s gonna know if Charlie pushed the buttons? All the answers are still coming from your head.”

“I’ll know,” Cas said, with a confused look pinching his eyebrows.

“But who are you gonna tell?” Dean replied.

Cas thought about that for a moment, looking into Dean’s insistent face. “Nobody?”

“Damn straight,” Dean said, resting his hand on Cas’s knee and grinning.

“Okay, then,” Charlie said, pulling the laptop around in front of her and wiggling her fingers above the keys. “I guess Sam can play Alex and ask the questions.”

After a few minutes, both Cas and Charlie felt confident that they had this under control. When the test started a few hours later, Sam and Dean stood back and watched the magic happen. Cas spat out every answer and Charlie typed them all in just as fast. When it was all over a congratulatory message appeared on the screen thanking Cas for taking the test and informing him that a producer would get in touch with him if he was selected to come in for an in person audition. And that was it.

Several weeks went by and between hunting and just going about their normal lives around the bunker, Sam all but forgot about Cas’s Jeopardy test. Cas hadn’t forgotten, but after the first week or so he’d even stopped mentioning it to Dean unless Dean brought it up first. As more time passed, their conversations on the subject sort of naturally petered out. They’d all but written it off as an interesting experience but one that would never amount to anything more. That was, until they got home from a grueling hunt to find a message on Cas’s phone.

_Hi, this is Maggie calling from Jeopardy. We’d like to invite you to an in-person audition. We’re going to be in San Diego the week of March 28th, so please give me a call back as soon as possible to let me know if you’ll be available._

Cas listened to the message three times before switching the phone to speaker and playing it again for Dean.

“So, can we make it to San Diego by March 28th?” he asked when the message finished.

Dean grinned the goofiest grin Cas had seen in a while and scooped him up into a hug. “Yeah, this is the kind of road trip I can get behind. San Diego in spring, not rainy as fuck New Jersey in January.”

Sam wandered into the kitchen a few minutes later to find them both dancing around like loons and joined in the celebration.

The day before they were set to leave for San Diego, Sam got a request for assistance from a hunter they’d met a few months back working on a banshee case entirely too close to home. He’d been keeping in touch with Eileen on and off because they enjoyed each other’s company, but he wasn’t about to leave her hanging if she needed his help on a hunt, even if it meant missing out on the San Diego trip. He took off right away for Ohio, leaving Cas and Dean to make the trek to California on their own. It wasn’t like they minded a little vacation alone now and then, especially one that was purely for fun where they were almost guaranteed that no hunting would be involved.

They arrived at their little beachside motel the day before Cas’s scheduled test and got to enjoy a long walk on the beach at sunset followed by a leisurely trip to a local diner. They’d only been in town three hours and already it had been the best beach vacation Dean’s had in… ever.

Cas insisted they should turn in early so he could be well rested before the interview, but Dean insisted on going over the personal interview segment information, aka blatant lies, that they crafted for Cas one last time. As far as Dean was concerned, that was Cas’s only potential stumbling block in the entire process.

“We spent at least an hour going over this in the car this afternoon,” Cas argued while they got ready for bed. “My name is Castiel Singer, I work mostly from home and in my spare time I enjoy beekeeping, gardening, and learning how to cook.”

Dean stopped brushing his teeth and raised his eyebrows expectantly in an invitation to continue, and Cas rolled his eyes and left the bathroom, shutting off the light on Dean as he went. Dean flicked it back on and tried not to laugh until he’d had a chance to spit. He rinsed his mouth, tidied up the bathroom sink, and then shut the light off again. Cas was already settled in bed so Dean climbed in and curled up next to him.

“I need to rest, Dean,” Cas warned him, turning off the light.

“I’m not stopping you, Cas. I just want to make sure you’re ready, and coaching you through your fake life story’s about the only thing I can do for you. ‘S not like I can teach you anything you don’t already know for the actual test.”

Dean nuzzled up to his shoulder, not pushing for attention but just settled there out of habit. It was comforting, knowing Dean was happier just like this, just because he was allowed to nestle down at Cas’s side every night. It’s not like Dean would admit to that, or at least not very often, but Cas knew anyway. And here he was, ready to do anything Cas asked of him to support him through this strange and slightly surreal process, all because Cas asked him to.

Well, the potential winnings were a substantial incentive, but Cas knew Dean would’ve encouraged him to do this for nothing, just because it had intrigued him. Cas sighed and turned over on his side to face Dean, running his fingers along Dean’s shoulder before pulling him in for a kiss.

“I live with my boyfriend of nearly a year and we enjoy traveling together. I wouldn’t be here at all if it wasn’t for him. He’s taught me more about what’s really important in life than anyone else.”

Dean felt his face heating up, and he was glad it was too dark in the room for Cas to see him try to hide his smile. He cleared his throat and found Cas’s face so he could kiss it.

“That wasn’t in the script, Cas.”

“It’s the truth, though, and it’s always easier to remember the truth over a lie.”

“Get some sleep,” Dean said eventually. “Big day tomorrow.”

“Are we going to head straight home after the test?”

“We don’t have to,” Dean said. “We drove all this way. Might as well get to enjoy it for a day or two.”

“I’d like that,” Cas replied through a yawn, and they drifted off content in each other’s arms.

 

When they got up the next morning to get dressed and head to the snazzy hotel where the auditions were taking place, Cas had texts from both Sam and Eileen wishing him luck. They were still hunting down what they thought might be a demon in rural Ohio and they’d been staking out a local crossroads two nights running with little luck. Hence the very early morning texts before they crashed out again until sunset.

Dean took Cas back to the little diner for breakfast and they ended up killing an hour there waiting for Cas’s 10:00 interview. Cas was all dressed up in his best Fed suit, but Dean was in his usual flannel and a decent light jacket. It’s not like Dean had to impress the Hollywood types. Cas could take care of that all on his own in his suit. At least Dean thought so.

Dean was disappointed but not surprised that he was asked to wait in the hotel’s lobby while Cas was ushered inside a small conference room for the next several hours. There were a few other friends and family members of potential contestants who’d come for moral support like Dean did, and the odd little group ended up clustering together in a little sitting area off to the side of the lobby. Cas turned one last time and waved at Dean sitting nervously with half a dozen complete strangers and then headed inside.

The room was set up a little bit like a classroom. Several long rows of tables with chairs spaced out at wide intervals along each one all faced the front of the room where a large monitor had been set up displaying the Jeopardy logo. Beneath the monitor was another long table with chairs facing back toward the rest of the room where several people were bustling around getting everything set up.

A few of the chairs were already filled with people too busy filling out paperwork to notice him, but Cas wandered up to the first row and took a seat near the center of the room, where an identical stack of forms and an official Jeopardy pen awaited him. He clicked it a few times and smiled.

The guy sitting next to him glanced over and laughed.

“Yeah, they’re the exact same size as the buzzer on the show,” the man said. “I got three of ‘em at home already.”

“Do you find it helps to practice with them?” Cas asked, looking from the pen to the man, still clicking away. He tried not to wonder how the man came to have three of the pens, yet was still here taking the test for presumably the fourth time without having been picked for the show.

The man laughed. “Yeah, I think it does.”

He went back to filling out his forms, so Cas did the same. He read them over carefully and made sure to include all the information Charlie had coached him on. While he was busy, the room filled up around him.

“Okay, I think everyone’s here,” a woman at the front of the room said a few minutes after Cas had finished. “Let’s get started.”

She introduced herself and the other people from the show and then talked a little about what it was like to be a contestant on Jeopardy. Cas listened to her anecdotes and laughed along with the rest of the potential contestants, getting more and more excited about the prospect of actually being chosen for the show. She did make it sound exciting.

 Next, someone else from the Jeopardy team got up and walked them through the paperwork to make sure it was all filled out completely, and that they all understood what their responsibilities would be if they were chosen to be on the show. Once he’d collected their completed forms, the first woman stood back up and explained exactly how the test would work. Just like the online test, there would be fifty questions and they’d have eight seconds to write down an answer for each one.

Cas clicked his official Jeopardy pen a few times for good luck and then the questions began. Dean and Sam had wondered if he should intentionally miss a few, but had finally agreed with Cas and Charlie that he should do the best he possibly could even if that meant answering every single question correctly. There was always the chance, however remote, that he actually might not know one of the answers and it would suck if he got passed over for deliberately missing too many.

When the test was finished and their answer forms were collected for grading, yet another crew member got up in front of the room and had everyone introduce themselves to each other as if they were on the show talking to Alex Trebek himself.  He went down the line to each person in turn and Cas only had a few moments to panic before suddenly it was his turn.

“I’m Castiel S-singer,” he said, and then cleared his throat. “But I go by Cas.”

“What do you like to do for fun, Cas?” the man asked, nodding encouragingly at Cas’s apparent nervousness.

“I read, and I enjoy watching movies with Dean. He’s teaching me how to cook, as well.”

“Ooh, gourmet cooking?” the man asked.

Cas shrugged. “Dean likes to think so.”

There were a few chuckles around the room and the man grinned back at him. “So, who’s this Dean?”

“He’s, uh. My boyfriend.”

“Well, he sounds like a keeper, then.” the man said, smiling. Cas recalled this man saying his job was to help the contestants feel comfortable with the whole process, and he was certainly doing an excellent job of it with Cas. “Have you been together long?”

“We’ve known each other about eight years,” Cas replied, and couldn’t help smiling while thinking about Dean.

“Well, that’s great! So do you have any big plans for your winnings?”

Cas had already listened to the first few people get teased for thinking _too small_ when they talked about paying off debt or buying a new car. And yes, financial stability was the main thing he’d been interested in the potential winnings for, but when the same question was posed to him he couldn’t really think of anything lavish or outrageous he’d even want. So he sort of told the truth.

“We do travel a lot, and we intend to do even more of that.”

“Maybe upgrade to first class once in a while?” the man joked.

Cas just shrugged, knowing he’d likely never get Dean on a plane even with a first class upgrade. And then mercifully the man moved on to the next contestant. By the time he’d chatted with everyone in the room, the tests were all tallied up and it was time to play the mock game. Even more than taking the test, this was the part that Cas was nervous about. He’d been practicing with his click pens but nothing could possibly prepare him for competing against two other people who’d also been practicing, likely for far longer than he’d been.

The hosts started out with a few general questions to the entire room and handed out a couple of prizes to people who guessed correctly-- DVD’s of special episodes and outtakes-- and Cas was thrilled when he won one. After that everyone was called up in groups of three to stand at the front of the room and play along exactly the way they would on the show.

They had to wait for a light to blink on before they could even try to ring in or they’d be locked out for a fraction of a second if they tried to push their buzzer too soon. That’s exactly what happened to Cas the first time he tried to buzz in to answer, but he got the hang of it pretty quickly. He was on a roll, having answered six questions in a row when they invited a new contestant up to take his place. He briefly wondered if he shouldn’t have tried quite so hard before one of the other Jeopardy crew members walked behind him and patted his shoulder, leaning down to whisper _great job_ before moving along.

After everyone had a chance to play, they opened up the floor for any questions. One woman asked about traveling to Los Angeles for the tapings, and she was told they tape two weeks worth of shows in two days, twice a month, so even if a contestant keeps winning they wouldn’t have to stay in LA indefinitely. It would be more like commuting every other week, with Jeopardy picking up the winner’s travel bill.

When they were finally dismissed a few minutes later, it was with the knowledge that they were officially entered into the contestant pool for the next eighteen months but that if they weren’t selected then they’d be welcome to take the test again.  Cas sat there for a few seconds in a daze while everyone else collected their things and began leaving. He looked around memorizing everyone’s faces, and hoped to recognize some of them if they got a chance to appear on the show.

He thanked Maggie one last time and then followed the crowd out to the lobby. Dean was waiting for him just outside the door to the conference room, a huge grin plastered on his face. Cas smiled when he saw Dean and politely pushed his way through the crowd to Dean’s side and hugged him.

“So, how was it?” Dean asked, nodding at one of the other contestants who stopped to wish Cas good luck, and then also shoot Dean a leering once over.

Cas wished her luck in return, either not noticing or not caring about the look she was giving his boyfriend, and then spilled out a play by play of the entire experience. Dean wrapped his arm around Cas’s shoulders and led him through the crowd, smiling the entire way back to the car while Cas recounted his adventure.

“And now I have an official click pen to practice with,” he finished, holding up the pen and clicking it a few times for Dean’s benefit.

 

Dean and Cas ended up spending a few days playing tourist in San Diego before Sam called them home for another hunt. Life went on and months passed. Between hunting and just trying to live a little bit, traveling for fun, showing Cas what it was like to be human, and Sam spending more and more time with Eileen, it had been quite a while since any of them had thought about their wacky strike-it-rich-in-Hollywood plan. Until Cas’s phone rang one innocent and otherwise entirely ordinary afternoon in the bunker.

Sam was remarkably not researching a hunt, just sitting in an armchair in the corner of the library enjoying a good book. Cas was at the table watching youtube videos of cats while Dean was in the kitchen making sandwiches. It was just your average Tuesday. At first, when Cas’s phone rang he thought it was Dean calling him from the kitchen to let him know that lunch was ready. He’d been known to do that on occasion. But when Dean entered the room with three plates piled with sandwiches and chips and three bottles of beer a second later, Cas checked his ringing phone and was almost too startled to answer it.

“H-hello?”

“Castiel Singer? Hi, this is Maggie from Jeopardy. We’d love to have you on the show, if you’re still interested.”

It took Cas a second of shocked staring at Dean’s intrigued face before he said, “Yes! I’m definitely still interested.”

Cas mouthed the word _Jeopardy_ at Dean while grinning and pointing at the phone, and that piqued both Dean’s and Sam’s interest. Twenty minutes later when Cas hung up, he received an email confirmation for his appearance with pages and pages of information and details on everything from where to stay in Los Angeles, the filming schedule, and a basic rundown of exactly what to expect, what to bring, and how to dress. It was all a little overwhelming, but between the three of them they had the entire trip planned by the time they finished their belated lunch.

Sam decided to make the trip out to LA with Eileen, who was just as excited for Cas as the rest of them were. They all left a few days early so they’d have a chance to relax a little before Cas had to appear on the show. Even if he finished last, the very thought of which made Dean laugh, they’d still end up with $1,000, which Dean also figured was more than enough to cover the cost of their hotel for a few extra days-- even the relatively nice hotel the show recommended they stay at.

Cas insisted they visit Griffith Park and the Observatory, they spent some time at the beach and wandering around the tourist traps in Hollywood, and then the morning of the taping was finally upon them. Cas was up two hours before he needed to be, but rather than pulling him back to bed Dean got up with him for an early breakfast and one last pep talk.

They’d been over their plan dozens of times, but one last time for Cas’s sake wouldn’t hurt. It essentially came down to _win, but not by too much_. No matter how nervous Cas might’ve been, Dean knew he’d be fine the moment the game started. That’s exactly what Dean kept telling him right up to the moment Cas boarded the hotel’s shuttle van with fourteen other equally nervous contestants for the pre-taping meeting at the studio. Dean stood out on the sidewalk waving like a mom sending her kindergartner away on the first day at school until the van disappeared from view, and then trudged back into the hotel to wait with Sam and Eileen.

Dean couldn’t head over until a few hours later to sit in the studio audience, so for the next few hours Cas was entirely on his own. The previous game’s returning champion was in the group on the bus, having returned to Los Angeles after a two week hiatus. She was a font of knowledge about what it’s like to appear on the show, and just listening to her anecdotes helped Cas feel more at ease.

He was wearing the same Fed suit he wore to the initial in-person interview, and he had a couple of other jackets and several additional ties in a garment bag to change into after his first win. All the contestants had similar bags with additional outfits, but Cas wondered if he was the only one who felt assured that he’d actually need them.

When they arrived at the studio a few minutes later, all the contestants were led into the green room, which wasn’t actually green but everyone kept calling it that anyway. Cas decided it was best not to ask why. They were all seated around a large table where they had even more paperwork to fill out. While he completed the new stack of forms, the contestants were given pointers on how to to play the game. Everything from remembering to answer in the form of a question to reminders on when and how to press the buzzer. Cas listened but he was far more concerned with remembering his false personal details than how using the wrong article could affect whether or not his responses on the show could be judged correct.

This was also when Cas had to commit to the interview topics for Alex to bring up during the meet the contestants segment of the show. While they were asked one by one to practice what they each might say to Alex in response to their chosen questions, they were also taken one by one into a little adjoining room to have makeup applied. Cas sat through the strange process and imagined what Dean would have to say about his new look when he saw him again.

The next order of business was a walk across the hall into the actual studio where the show was taped. Most of the contestants were sat down off to the side in the first few rows of seats in the audience, to be called up three at a time to get a feel for what being on stage was really like. They got to practice with the buzzers, practice writing their names and wagers for the Final Jeopardy round, and then practice with the real game board set up with old clues from past games.

Some contestants had more difficulty than others and remained at their podium longer, but Cas had no trouble adapting his click pen technique to the actual buzzer. After getting four questions right in a row he was excused to make way for the next contestant in line.

When everyone had had a chance up on stage, they were led back to the green room for a short break and to await the studio audience. The returning champion was all set to go and two challengers were chosen for her. Cas tried not to feel disappointed that he was not one of them. If nothing else, it would give him a chance to observe the entire procedure before he’d have to get up and do it himself. He tried not to let it make him nervous.

 

Dean was more than nervous enough for everyone. It was bad enough having to drive Baby through LA traffic, but he was so preoccupied with how Cas was doing that Sam asked him to pull over at the next shopping center to let him take over driving.

“Dude, just sit in the passenger seat and worry about Cas,” Sam said when Dean grudgingly handed over the keys.

Eileen reached over the seat and patted his shoulder, so Dean turned around to look at her.

“He’s fine, Dean,” she said. “He’s gonna kick it in the ass.”

Dean smiled and nodded at her. “He just shouldn’t have to be there alone.”

“He’s not alone, Dean,” Sam replied, merging back into traffic. “And we’ll be there in like five minutes, so chill. He handled the spotlight at a Supernatural convention where hundreds of fangirls were all over you guys. He can handle a few fellow game show contestants.”

Dean sat there stunned while Sam drove the rest of the way to the studio and parked in the garage. He’d thought about it before, but Sam’s reminder of their little trip to the alternate reality where they’d had to spend three days pretending to be the actors who played them on television was the perfect proving ground for Cas. He’d handled that like a champ, but that didn’t mean Dean still wasn’t a wreck on his behalf. Sue him, but Dean Winchester was a worrier, especially when it came to the people he loved.

“Yeah, he’s gonna be fine,” Dean said before finally opening his door and getting out of the car.

They were met just inside the studio’s gate by a man wearing a blue Jeopardy polo shirt and carrying a clipboard with a list of names printed on it. Sam checked all three of them in and returned with three official audience member stickers they were instructed to wear, oddly enough, on the leg of their pants rather than on their shirts.

“In case they use a shot of the audience, we won’t all look like we’re wearing name tags,” Sam replied when Dean gave him a funny look.

Over the next few minutes, the crowd of contestants’ family members grew. Dean was both relieved and a little disappointed that none of the people he’d met at Cas’s audition seemed to be there. While Sam was busy translating the audience instructions into sign language for Eileen, another man approached him and struck up a conversation.

“You got someone on the show today?”

Dean nodded. “Yeah. You too?”

The man beamed at him. “Yeah, my wife’s the returning champ, so I’m used to the drill now. You just look a little tense, is all. I swear it’s all a lot of good fun once we’re inside.”

“I hope so,” Dean replied.

Just then the PA with the clipboard called for attention and began leading the long parade of audience members through the lot to the studio. Dean took a deep breath and Sam gave him a fortifying and reassuring clap on the shoulder, and they were off.

 

Cas and the rest of the contestants who hadn’t been selected to play in the first game were already seated in their section of the audience when everyone else filed in. He turned in his seat to watch the crowd take their seats, smiling when he caught Dean’s eye. Dean waved, but Cas could only nod. They’d been instructed not to acknowledge anyone they knew in the rest of the audience, but he almost couldn’t help but watch Dean settle in half a dozen rows behind him. As if the final piece of a puzzle clicked into place, Cas finally felt grounded and ready to do this. Now he just had to sit and wait for his turn.

 

Dean sat down next to Sam but didn’t take his eyes off of Cas. Three other contestants were already standing by the edge of the stage waiting for the taping to begin, but Cas was sitting in the audience just like everyone else.

“He’s not playing yet,” Dean whispered, leaning in so Sam could hear him over the murmuring of the audience.

“Maybe he’ll be up next, Dean. Relax,” Sam whispered back. “Just enjoy the show.”

 

When the entire audience was seated, the show’s announcer came out on stage to warm the crowd up. He told a few jokes, explained the audience’s job to clap when it was appropriate and to laugh when when something was funny, and pretty much shut up the rest of the time, and then everything was moving into place and suddenly the game was starting.

During the first commercial break Alex introduced himself to the audience and welcomed them all to the studio. Right after that the show started up again and Dean watched Cas carefully watching the interview portion of the show as intently if he was imagining himself answering one of the random questions.

It all flew by so quickly that Cas stopped worrying about everything and simply fell into the the rhythm of the game. Sure he wasn’t up on stage doing it for real yet, but it was just a matter of time before he was. He realized it was actually a blessing that he wasn’t selected right away, because the last of his concerns disappeared completely by the time the Final Jeopardy music was playing and the contestants were writing down their answers to the last question of the game.

It had been a close game, but in the end the returning champion had beaten out both of her challengers by a narrow margin, and then the game was over. All three contestants were repositioned on stage to have a conversation with Alex while the closing credits music played, and then they were whisked away so the stage could be reset for the next game.

The two departing contestants signed off on their final paperwork and were handed a packet explaining their winnings, and then sought out their family members in the audience. The returning champ was escorted back to the green room to change her clothes before the next episode and two more contestants were chosen to join her up on stage. This time, Cas was chosen to stand at the middle podium.

He glanced frantically up at Dean, hoping he noticed what was going on, and was reassured when Dean smiled and gave him a thumbs up. This was all really happening but Cas didn’t feel any more nervous than he did that very first time he and Dean cuddled together on their bed in that awful little motel and watched Jeopardy during a torrential storm. He nodded once at Dean and let himself be led up on stage.

Three rounds later, including one awkwardly funny story about eating an entire box of macarons on a Paris sidewalk with Dean, Cas was declared the runaway champion of Jeopardy. He’d won over $45,000 in less than half an hour. When his final score had been announced and the audience clapped, Dean had shouted out, “Yeah, that’s my angel.” He’d garnered some weird looks from a few members of the audience, but he recognized Maggie from Cas’s interview back in San Diego now standing down by the stage, and she laughed and nodded approvingly at him.

Less than ten minutes later, Cas was back on stage standing at the champ’s lectern in a grey suit with two new challengers at his side and the whole thing began again. Cas flew through the questions and Dean laughed at the grumpy face he made when Alex stopped the round for the first commercial break. He waited impatiently through the first two contestants’ introductions before Alex finally got back to Cas.

“Yesterday you told us about your trip to Paris, but it says here that you’ve travelled extensively. Now that you’ve won a little bit of money, where do you plan to go next?”

Cas smiled. “Wherever Dean would like to go. I believe it’s his turn to pick our next destination.”

“That’s very generous of you,” Alex replied. “Giving him first choice with your winnings.”

Cas just shrugged and glanced up toward where he knew Dean was sitting even if he couldn’t see him beyond the bright stage lights. “Dean’s given me everything. It’s the very least I can do for him.”

A few people in the audience aww’ed and Dean felt his cheeks turn a little bit pink, but he didn’t have time to be embarrassed because he was too busy watching Cas blow his competition out of the water. At the end of the game he’d picked up another $50,000, and then the entire audience was suddenly being dismissed for a lunch break.

Dean was hoping he’d be able to spend their hour long break with Cas, but the contestants were ushered over to the studio commissary while the remainder of the audience was given directions to a couple of local sandwich shops and fast food restaurants within walking distance of the studio. He found himself being led to a deli across the street by Sam and Eileen before he could even think to protest about not getting to see Cas yet.

“A hundred thousand bucks,” Sam said while they were waiting for their order. “Just think how much salt we could buy with that.”

Eileen laughed and added that it was probably more salt than all four of them could go through in a lifetime.

They didn’t have long to eat, and before they knew it they were back in the studio and the next game was beginning. Cas just kept right on winning. After the final two games of the day, he had to sign some paperwork in order to claim his prizes. He was given instructions about returning the next morning for the next day’s taping and then finally he was reunited with Dean.

“Dude, you’re orange,” was the first thing Dean said to him after Cas had practically tackled him with a kiss.

Dean wiped at his own face and was relieved that the makeup hadn’t seemed to rub off on him. He slung an arm over Cas’s shoulders and then led him back to the Impala.

“I knew you wouldn’t like the makeup,” Cas said.

“I was gonna suggest we go out for a celebratory dinner, but you need to scrub that shit off first,” Dean replied.

“We can definitely afford it now,” Sam said. “What’s good to eat in this town anyway?”

Their celebratory dinner ended up being a very casual affair at a taco place a few blocks from their hotel. Cas didn’t want to be out late since he had to be up early again for taping the following morning, and everyone else agreed. They’d save the real celebration for after Cas’s final appearance on the show.

Back in their room after dinner, Dean did insist on a little private celebration and Cas didn’t object to that one bit. Afterward, sprawled out across Dean’s chest while they recovered, Cas told Dean about his day.

“I know I can’t keep winning beyond tomorrow, but it has been fun.”

Dean dragged his fingers up and down Cas’s back and leaned up to kiss his temple. “I know, babe. I’d let you keep going forever if I thought it was safe.”

Cas laid there for a minute enjoying the feel of Dean’s hands on him and then pushed himself up to look down into Dean’s eyes. “Maggie already said something about returning for the Tournament of Champions if I kept playing the way I did today.”

“Yeah, that ain’t happening,” Dean said, though he regretted having to. “We’d be painting a target on the studio for every monster in the whole damn country. We can’t put all those people at risk just for a little extra cash.”

“Technically it’s a lot of extra cash, but I understand,” Cas replied, and then leaned in for a kiss. “Thank you, Dean. This has definitely made the top ten of strange things you’ve let me do.”

“Let’s get something straight,” Dean said, rolling over and pulling Cas in against him. “I didn’t _let_ you come out here. I’m having fun too. It’s not every day you get to watch a former angel of the lord clean up on a game show.”

“And you won’t have to hustle pool for at least a couple of years now,” Cas replied.

“Fuck that. I don’t just hustle pool for the money. Gotta keep the skills up.”

“Well we won’t have to worry about money for a while either way.”

“Now our biggest worry is gonna be dealing with people who recognize you from television.”

Cas shrugged and gave Dean one last kiss before settling down with his head against his shoulder. “Luckily we already know how that feels. At least it won’t be like it was in Paris.”

“Yeah, no matter how well you do, I don’t think we’re gonna need a crowd of bodyguards to keep you safe from your adoring fans.”

 

Day two of taping went pretty much like day one. Cas was up early again and Dean took him down to breakfast before seeing him off on the little hotel bus with fourteen different newbie contestants. Dean looked them all over wondering which of them was going to be the one Cas would let unseat him from his throne. He sat with Sam and Eileen in the audience and they went back to the same little sandwich shop for lunch. Just as they’d planned, Cas struggled a little bit on the final episode of the day and ended up finishing in second place.

When all the paperwork was handled, they had nothing to do but sit back and wait for the episodes to air and then collect their check.

“Three hundred and forty two thousand dollars,” Sam said, raising his beer at the little dive bar Dean found near their hotel. “Not bad for two days’ work.”

“Speaking of work,” Cas replied after they’d all clinked their bottles together. He pointed up at the television above the bar where a news story ran about a handful of suspicious deaths in a small town just up the coast. “That looks like it could be our kinda thing.”

“Come on, Cas,” Dean groaned. “We gotta take just one night to celebrate.”

“But we’ll go check it out tomorrow,” Sam agreed.

“So you officially got the Jeopardy thing out of your system now?” Dean asked. “No regrets?”

Cas thought about that for just a minute before answering. “I just wish there was an amount of money that could buy us a trip back to Paris.”

“You can go back if you want,” Eileen argued. “Planes leave every day.”

Cas just smiled and shook his head. “Not our Paris. Or not even any Paris, really.”

“You just want to see how they’re doing,” Dean said, understanding right away.

“I wouldn’t mind an update either,” Sam replied.

“I just wanna know who they hired to play me,” Eileen said. “If you guys figure out a way to zap yourselves back to their universe, take me along for the ride next time.”

 

And so they set out on their next adventure.

**Author's Note:**

> Little disclaimer here, I have been on Jeopardy! (I'm not excited about it, it's just technically misspelled if you leave off the exclamation point, so I've been told). So has Mr. Mittens. I've experienced it both from the family member in the audience side, as well as the on-stage bit. (yes, we both won) All the random answers Cas called out in the motel room were taken directly from our games (two for me, three for Mr. Mittens).
> 
> The thing about the Jeopardy click pens is true. See the [tumblr post for this story](https://www.tumblr.com/post/147579957815) for a picture of one of mine. Yes, I have several.
> 
> If you're REALLY bored, my games are archived [ here](http://www.j-archive.com/showplayer.php?player_id=6773). There's a link to Mr. Mittens' games, too. :)


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